Voluntold

In retrospect, his graduation from boot camp couldn’t have come at a better time. I had just finished school for the summer, so I didn’t have to worry about driving back and forth and missing out on spending time with him while I was at school and in class while he was home on leave.  

During his time in Minnesota, we threw him a graduation party to celebrate both his graduation from high school, and his graduation from boot camp. I think this was probably the first time I had met most of his extended family so it was kind of a big deal for me too. I don’t think I even remember what else we ended up doing. But I do know this. I had never experienced 10 days that went so slow, and so fast at the same time.

One thing that I don’t think I completely realized until, probably, deployment #2, was that not only was boot camp preparing his body and his mind for what the next 4 years would hold, but it was also preparing the loved ones that would be his “cheering section” for the next 4 years. The Marine Corps was conditioning me to deal with the challenges the future would hold. And it amazes me how well it worked.

When I say that those 10 days went slow, and fast at the same time, it may be hard to understand, but the only way I can explain it, is this. After 13 weeks of not talking through anything but letters, it’s a little hard to get back into the swing of things, to get used to being able to talk to him in the flesh. It seems nearly impossible to talk in “real time” without having time to think over your words and pick and choose the things that are most important or most interesting. It’s almost like you have to re-associate with each other and try to get used to being around each other again. And, after spending 13 weeks apart, 10 days together seemed impossible. It didn’t seem like it was possible for us to be able to spend that long together—especially after the 2 days of pure (Chinese Water) Torture. It’s these things that made these 10 days seem like a lifetime.

However, at the same time, with those 10 days, came the unknown future. I knew that I would be spending 10 days of leave with him and that he would then return to California. But after he got on that plane, I had no idea when I might see him again. And when you’re facing an unknown like that, it makes that time fly by faster than you could ever imagine. But this is what prepares families for what is to come, and to not take the time they have for granted. To make the most of the time that they have together. More training, even while on leave.

And so it was. After those 10 days were up, I was faced with another emotional and difficult “good-bye”, which was just the second of many, MANY more to come. He headed back to California—this time to Camp Pendleton, where he was to continue his training with the MCT (Marine Combat Training) course. This training was less strict, and allowed us to at least communicate with each other through other resources than snail mail. It was also a shorter training—this time, only 4 weeks. However, almost immediately after that, he continued his training at Camp Pendleton by starting his MOS (Military Occupational Specialty) school.

He was voluntold to become a part of the Amphibious Assault Battalion. I say voluntold, because he really had no choice in the matter. When I said that the military liked to change their minds a lot, I wasn’t joking. It seems as though the “recruits”, while they are being recruited and told many, many lies. And they are given “glamour” stories about certain things. One of these things is their MOS. They give the recruits a list of jobs, making it seem like they can pick which one they want. However, they then proceed to attempt to convince you, that one of the jobs is WAY better than all the rest. For Steve, this started out as something involving aircrafts. Then it moved on to tanks, and eventually landed on Amphibious Assault Vehicles. Each time, the job they were pushing was made to seem so glamorous—although I don’t think there is any job in the Marine Corps that is glamorous—or at least not when you are straight out of boot camp. In essence, he was more or less TOLD that he had to work with Amphibious Assault Vehicles, but, through deception, it was made to look like he volunteered for that job---hence the term “voluntold”.

Nevertheless, this is what he attended school and further training for, and what he would spend the next 3½ years of his life doing.

The nice thing about MOS school is that it was MUCH more relaxed, and made being in two COMPLETELY different states a little easier on us—me especially. He was able to have his own cell phone that he could use after “working hours”—which was usually somewhere between 4 and 6. And he also ended up buying a laptop that he could use to connect to the Internet and talk to me online. During this time, he was also given many opportunities to do things that were a little step outside the military lifestyle. He was able to go to an Anaheim Angels game—for free, and without having to do any work at it—because of something they were doing in which they wanted military members there to “honor”. He also got to do “security” at a Brad Paisley concert in which he was in charge of the “handicapped’ section—where all of the people in wheel chairs were able to watch the concert (I’m sure they really gave him a run for his money!). I think it was nice for him to be able to get away after being forced to remain in close quarters with a bunch of guys for 4+ months constantly.

It also helped me to know that he was at least able to have a LITTLE fun despite being so far away from friends and family.

In all honesty, I think that this is the point in the active duty that I remember the least about. It was such an improvement over the rituals of boot camp, that we were overjoyed to have the opportunity to talk to each other, basically every night. In many ways it was the closest to a “normal” relationship that we ever got while he was in the military. This leaves me wishing that I remembered more about it and that I had taken advantage of that “normalcy” while we had it. I am hoping that some day I will stumble upon emails or letters from that time and be reminded the “little things” that happened.